Why are we getting into relationship? It’s actually supposed to bring out the best in each other. When you’re in a relationship, you will feel good sharing your life with someone who understands and knows you as a partner. But there are times when a good relationship can lead to a devastating breakup.

One of many reasons might be a problem that was originated from either you or partner in the relationship. Most couples would sometime try the easy way out by either ignoring the problem or just go on their separate ways. But if you truly love each other, then both of you should really reconsider the option.

No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won’t make you cry”

Here are some of the ways that will help you overcome those pesky conflicts and rebuilt your relationship

1. First, in order to use conflict to your advantage, you have to welcome it. To welcome personal struggles does not mean to incite or purposely create trouble. Rather, to welcome conflict means to recognize that it is normal and that it can be used to become a better person.
2. Begin your concern or complaint in a positive way. This may involve saying things like “I really appreciate when you accompany me today. I would love it if we could be spending more time together.” or “I felt very hurt when you talked badly behind my back and I need you to be open with me and discuss my problems.”
3. Recognize the other person’s intrinsic value. Each person is created uniquely and has eternal value. Sure, some individuals are rougher around the edges than others. Yet, everyone has a exclusive place in society and should deserves to be given the benefit of the doubt. This does not mean that you should submit yourself to abuse or put yourself in harm’s way. It however mean that you will need to learn the art of asking and giving forgiveness. When you are willing to see the intrinsic worth of the offending party, you will be able to ask for and or extend forgiveness to that person. Furthermore, you will be more apt to find an amicable solution to the problem.
4. Don’t criticize each other’s beliefs. Both of you should stay as neutral as possible and keep in mind that blaming each other will not get you anywhere. Criticizing each other’s actions will do more damage than good in your relationship, leaving you both emotionally battered. It’s a good idea to find some common ground that both of you can share.
5. Be comprehensible, specific, and, if possible, make a request for a change that you would like or compromise. Work out a plan so both of you could agree to and work towards it.
6. Avoid becoming defensive quickly. Try to understand what is important to your partner in the disagreement. Stay calm and ask questions on the topic to gather the rationale of the unhappiness. It can be hard to address a problem if you do not know what the issue really is, and why it is a problem for someone. Find a way to pursue the concern and understand the other perspective while trying not to be thinking inside your head about your own side to the discussion.
7. Find a suitable time to talk things out. If you or your partner starts to get upset, take a break and come back to the concern. When people begin to get upset, they become emotionally overwhelmed and  generally cannot talk in productive ways. It is better to take a break at that point and later revisit the concern.
8. Look for opportunities to make injection into the positive feelings in the relationship so that a disagreement does not spoil the day. Turned the disagreement into a table of good feelings about each other and your life together, you get through this easily.
9. After you have formulated a proper attitude towards the person and the conflict, take the first step to resolving the issue. Chances are the other person is equally afraid of confrontation. You should take the initiative to make things straight. Of course, this is especially true if you are the cause of the issue, but, regardless of whose fault it is, take the first step and, you will not only restore the relationship, you will probably enhance it.
10. Both you and your partner should do your best in filling what’s lacking in your relationship and make it work. Keeping a relationship is not simple and there will be times where it’ll leave you frustrated, sad and exhausted. If, however, things will not work out despite all measures to resolve the problem, then it might be best to leave things the way they are and go your separate ways. Keep in mind that separation, break-ups and even divorce should always be the last resort when dealing with a troubled relationship. But if you truly love each other, this trial can make your relationship stronger than ever before.

Well, managing or resolving conflict can be very stressful and often tedious. Yet, even the tensest relational issues can be used to grow as a person. With the above tips on how to employ conflict to your advantage, I hope it will make your life easier.

Do you have other tips on how to resolve or manage conflict? Share it with us to improve our relationship.